I need to share. I need a job. I don't know what and how. Just know I have to get out there. Stuck in the mud kind of feeling. Don't know how, I am not that fast anymore or it seems to me. I don't know what to do. So many don't knows. Should I just do it. Be brave and do it? And then see how it goes? It won't kill me or anyone, I guess?!Just in my head. In the head. then. Let's move on!

Life is amazing. It has twists and turns. Surprising sometimes, saddenning the other times, cheering and many other variants. Amazing. I've got so much to tell. Will do. Right now just this. Amazing.

Joy

Happy to realise that what I am doing now is something that makes me ME and is easy and so fulfilling. I am a teacher and seeing people's happy eyes, full of gratitude is something to work for to live for, I feel that I am doing something worthwhile. I am appreciated and loved and I am in love with all my students. Happiness indeed :)

Bored, bored, bored!!!! Laughing at myself, such a boredom I have never felt in many years!!! Just left a gang of people, my relatives, my cousin says it is adaptation to being away from them again... Wow, that's hard:) Thinking what to do to get back to unagitated state, unbored state... Will probably start taking pictures again or singing or something totally ne, like tennis! Think I am cheered up again at least for now:) Hope you all are in great form!!!

It feels like I've lost it. I mean, Inspiration... Or am I mistaking it with low mood? I guess, and the tooth that bothers added to it. Well, yeah, it happens, just let not yourself take it too seriously. I will not:)

In love

Sometimes it just happens... It feels so good, you are like a bird. Heart is beating differently, somehow happily. You think about the reasons of the changes. You smile and just know you are in love... Is it pleasant, is the feeling mutual? You actually do not care just now. Let it flow and enjoy the heartbeat...

Things happen

I was celebrating my birthday one night and well, it was awesome!! But that is not what I am trying to tell you at the moment. I got a text message from a person I didn't know. He sent a text to me by mistake .I refused to continue our conversation at some point, even though he was a very polite person and wished me a happy birthday. We stopped texting, but a few months later we happened to meet in the network world again.

We spoke on the phone, interesting. He told me he was in prison and that didn't surprise me much. I am a very curious person and my purpose was to get as much information from him as possible. So I learned that it is not as bad in prison as they all tell. They live quite a life there, just a bit boring at times-that is the main idea in imprisonment, I guess. They are not allowed phones, but for decent money that you get through a prison's shop assistant or someone else from your parents or friends. Yeap, they have shops there in prison too, just like in real life, out here!

The most common question you ask a prisoner: are you guilty? The most common answer: I am not guilty. Yep. That is the truth-no man likes to admit fault and rarely does... Don't you think?! Thats what the statistics say and we all know.

The point I am trying to bring here is that we get to know people so unexpectedly sometimes. And actually very meaningful too. I later realised that that experience, his attitude to life was the opposite to mine. I realised how righteous my life was, how rewarding and rich. He helped me in the moment of despair, when I felt like in prison covered with problems, to feel freedom and presence of fantastic people around me.

Life is on your side

Recently I feel that life is easier when we relax our minds, listen to our hearts and just expect the best. I read loads of articles and books and reading them gave an idea of some superpower that is watching and guiding you and at the very first I was so fighting to fulfill my dreams, was working hard and even ahead of my own thoughts and nothing seemed to work out as I wished. I just had to stop for a break, I just 'took a nap' from all my businesses to discover one day that all is coming so naturally and everyone is on your side and every day is a fantastic new opportunity!

GOALS

Recently all I hear and see in the books, magazines is: define what is what you like to do most and do it well, then you are going to be satisfied and rewarded. But what if you like everything and would like to conduct everything at the same time... What if you cannot chose? What if you like many things and activities and can not concentrate on one? What happens to such persons? Can they be professionals at something particular? Like, totally professional, you know, they can do this and the others can't? Is it so necessary? Or can you just be what you are and care not of what society needs from you... Da Vinci. He was an architect, scientist, artist, historian, and more. And he is known for his one painting mostly and just some projects, but he actually was important for the society in some way, and he devoted himself to doing what he liked - everything. I think, he was happy and lived long, he was not one-goal-setter, it seems. So, maybe, some of us do not need to be?...

POWERFUL BEYOND MEASURE

Every new day is a great source for ideas. Every day there is something that can make you go wild and start a new thing! Happens when you really need it and want it. And it feels so good, doesn't it?!
And don't be afraid to go forward if it feels right. don't be afraid of your own light (OUR DEEPEST FEAR IS NOT THAT WE ARE INADEQUATE. OUR DEEPEST FEAR THAT WE ARE POWERFUL BEYOND MEASURE. IT IS OUR LIGHT NOT DARKNESS THAT FRIGHTENS US MOST. AND WHEN WE LET OUR LIGHT SHINE, OUR PRESENCE LIBERATES OTHERS AND LET THEM DO THE SAME. Nelson Mandela ). Great, lets do it!